The Blog

No, this is not a book list of hot and spicy beach reads. This is practical advice for monogamous relationship-minded people whether you’re married or dating. I’ve been navigating the tricky world of dating in my forties with kids for over seven years now and I’ve come across a lot of things I never encountered when I was dating in my twenties. These books have helped me understand the confusing behaviors I’ve encountered and they’ve also taught me how to be a better partner. I’ll keep adding to this list as I discover more helpful expert advice in my relationship journey.

• 8 Rules of Love by Jay Shetty – Instead of trying to emulate the cliches we see in the movies, this book teaches us skills to cultivate and practice real love.
• Atlas of the Heart by Dr. Brené Brown – This book is the encyclopedia of terms to thoughtfully describe our emotions and more fully understand matters of the heart.
• Attached by Dr. Amir Levine and Rachel Heller – Your attachment style (which was formed in your first years of life) affects how you handle adult intimacy. 
• Fight Right by Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman and Dr. John Gottman – “Conflict is the top reason couples seek help—but it’s also an opportunity for greater intimacy, deeper connection, and lasting love.”
• Love Life by Matthew Hussey – It’s time to raise your standards and stop settling!
• The Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins – My biggest takeaway was how to apply these tools in romantic relationships. We all know you can’t change your partner, so what do you do if they’re behaviors are driving you nuts?
• Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel – This book explores the conflict between secure love and passion, the union of domesticity and sexual desire. I highly recommend it if you have kids and want your relationship to stay spicy despite that.
• Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus by John Gray, Ph.D. – On oldie, but a goody. “A Practical Guide for Improving Communication and Getting What You Want in Your Relationships.”
• The Seven Levels of Intimacy by Matthew Kelly – Understand how to relate to your partner on the deepest level and help each other become the best version of yourselves.

And, this one is not a book, but I also think it’s really important to understand the love languages and how you and your partner prefer to give and receive love.